Still 3cm and 80%... STILL.
Almost two months ago, I had my first contractions and the doctor said he was "preparing to come".
One month ago, the doctor said we could have a "Christmas baby".
2 weeks ago she said that he would be here any day.
Last monday I started maternity leave under the assumption that it was almost time.
Tomorrow is his due date and all I have are a bunch of random and painful contractions - no baby.
Who knows?! Maybe he'll surprise us and be right on time. I love the experience of carrying him, don't get me wrong. Waking up to his little hiccups is one of the most adorable things in this world. But, not quite as adorable as I know his face will be. His face! I'm just ready to see it. So come on, already.
In other news (still baby-related, of course) John and I have had a last minute reconsideration on baby Greider's name. We're still on for "Collins Sullivan" but instead of calling him "Collins", we're thinking of calling him "Sully". Sullivan was my maternal grandfather's last name. Everyone called him "Sully" - I called him "Papa Sully". He was a great man - funny, kind, completely devoted to his family, and even though he died 15 years ago I can still clearly hear the sound of his amazing laugh. It is a name to live up to and one that I hope my son will carry proudly.
Showing posts with label butterbean. Show all posts
Showing posts with label butterbean. Show all posts
1.21.2009
1.06.2009
"life will never be the same"
"On the night you were born, the moon shone with such wonder that the stars peeked in to see you and the night wind whispered 'Life will never be the same.' Because there had never been anyone like you... ever, in the world."
-- An excerp from Nancy Tillman's book, On The Night You Were Born
With the baby coming "any day now", according to my doctor, you can only imagine how consumed I am with everything baby. I bought On The Night You Were Born at my most recent Barnes & Noble rendezvous (can't get enough of that place). When John read it aloud to me and the belly on Sunday night, I could hardly control the swells of tears in my eyes. The whole book is so true and perfectly worded that I can't imagine one single day passing that I won't read it to baby Collins.
So, like I said, i'm one brisk afternoon walk away from meeting this new little fellow and the anticipation mounts with every passing day. Last night I had two strong contractions that woke me from sleeping and I lept out of the bed thinking "THIS IS IT! IT'S TIME!". WRONG! Can you imagine being completely prepared (well, almost completely) for something and then having to sit idly by and wait with absolutely no hint of when it's coming? Have you ever been stuck in the airport for a flight delay? Every minute that passes is another minute that you get older and more antsy wondering when the hell your flight will be ready. Well... this is SO much worse than that! It's exhausting! I need to meet this guy - hear his sweet baby cries - and know that all ten fingers and toes are properly placed.
As intense and overwhelming as I make it all sound, my latest blood pressure reading indicated otherwise. I'm as cool as a cucumber. Is someone slipping me Xanax? I wouldn't be surprised. I'm feeling more relaxed than EVER before. I may even branch out to use the word "sedated". Calm. It's unusual. It's unexpected. And i'm loving it. I thought I was alone in this eerie calm until I read the blog of another hip prego who experienced the same thing. This calm has also brought about an over-powering love and adoration for John. I want to hug him and shout my love for him from the rooftops. If he only knew! Maybe it would be a good idea to tell him. Whatever this natural remedy is, i'm embracing it. It's certainly a nice change of pace from the raging and uncontrollable hormonal swings i've experienced the other 8-1/2 months.
Looks like the real Courtney is back. Or is this just the calm before the storm?
At any rate, I believe my fabulous friend, Rachel, put it best in an email she sent me this morning... "enjoy your last few moments before you become a mommy forever." Forever! I've never been so ready for "forever".
"Life will never be the same." **smiles & happy tears**
-- An excerp from Nancy Tillman's book, On The Night You Were Born
With the baby coming "any day now", according to my doctor, you can only imagine how consumed I am with everything baby. I bought On The Night You Were Born at my most recent Barnes & Noble rendezvous (can't get enough of that place). When John read it aloud to me and the belly on Sunday night, I could hardly control the swells of tears in my eyes. The whole book is so true and perfectly worded that I can't imagine one single day passing that I won't read it to baby Collins.
So, like I said, i'm one brisk afternoon walk away from meeting this new little fellow and the anticipation mounts with every passing day. Last night I had two strong contractions that woke me from sleeping and I lept out of the bed thinking "THIS IS IT! IT'S TIME!". WRONG! Can you imagine being completely prepared (well, almost completely) for something and then having to sit idly by and wait with absolutely no hint of when it's coming? Have you ever been stuck in the airport for a flight delay? Every minute that passes is another minute that you get older and more antsy wondering when the hell your flight will be ready. Well... this is SO much worse than that! It's exhausting! I need to meet this guy - hear his sweet baby cries - and know that all ten fingers and toes are properly placed.
As intense and overwhelming as I make it all sound, my latest blood pressure reading indicated otherwise. I'm as cool as a cucumber. Is someone slipping me Xanax? I wouldn't be surprised. I'm feeling more relaxed than EVER before. I may even branch out to use the word "sedated". Calm. It's unusual. It's unexpected. And i'm loving it. I thought I was alone in this eerie calm until I read the blog of another hip prego who experienced the same thing. This calm has also brought about an over-powering love and adoration for John. I want to hug him and shout my love for him from the rooftops. If he only knew! Maybe it would be a good idea to tell him. Whatever this natural remedy is, i'm embracing it. It's certainly a nice change of pace from the raging and uncontrollable hormonal swings i've experienced the other 8-1/2 months.
Looks like the real Courtney is back. Or is this just the calm before the storm?
At any rate, I believe my fabulous friend, Rachel, put it best in an email she sent me this morning... "enjoy your last few moments before you become a mommy forever." Forever! I've never been so ready for "forever".
"Life will never be the same." **smiles & happy tears**
12.22.2008
Today marks one month, to the day...
before I meet the new little man in my life! The one who has been keeping me awake all night... sending me to the potty every 30 minutes... making me so hungry that I've almost gone into debt buying Ben & Jerry's Half Baked and Hardee's gravy biscuits ... punching my insides... and "un-glueing" me physically & emotionally for the past 8 months. One month to the day, until that wonderful day when I meet the little man who is making me fall insanely, head over heels, uncontrollably in love every single minute of every single day. One month!
It's amazing to me how much you can love someone that you've never met. Especially when that someone causes you to pee in your pants atleast once a day. I imagine his little face, so perfect and round, and how precious it will be to see his soft, tiny hand wrapped around John's finger. I wonder if I will melt into a ball of mush at the first sound of his baby cries or what it will feel like the day we bring him home. Will he have John's great hair, my eyes, a good sense of humor? Will he be a t-ball all-star or spelling bee champ? Will he love me as much as I already love him? And will the first moment I hold him in my arms be as overwhelmingly wonderful as I have envisioned?
These are the sweet thoughts I wrap myself in on the days when the "joys" of pregnancy are staring me down into the toilet. I have definitely earned a new-found respect for mother's across the globe, because, let me tell ya', it sure hasn't been easy, Soulshine. In fact, some of those days have been down-right miserable!
There was the morning that I yacked in the shower! I couldn't stop puking so, naked & wet, I proceeded towards the toilet where... I puked so hard, I pee'd ALL OVER THE FLOOR. And if that wasn't bad enough, in the midst of being exhausted from puking and still green with nausea, I had to clean out a shower that was filled with last night's dinner and a floor that was covered in a bladder full of pee. I didn't eat lima beans again for 6 months! (I know, I know. You're thinking you could have done without that, right? Well, so could I!)
Then came month 6 when I had my flu shot & glucose screening (to test for diabetes). Apparently the combination was too much for my already tired body and somewhere between the hours of 2 and 3, I passed out cold on my desk at work, waking up 2 hours later to a pile of drool and one very confused customer.
Oh! Then there was that unforgettable night at John's softball game, in the fall. Sporting my newly protruding belly, I made way to the bathroom stall to pee. I was still learning how to maneuver properly and apparently, hadn't worked out all the kinks in my squat & hover (ladies - we all know about the public bathroom "squat & hover") and I pee'd all down the back of my brand new maternity blue jeans. Imagine the embarrassment of walking back out to a bleacher full of people with a huge dark stain down the back of your pants. Not pleasant! I imagined the baby, all snuggled in my belly, laughing his adorable buns off at his idiot mommy who just pee'd herself.
I've had heartburn & headaches that I thought would kill me - learned to say the words "diarrhea" & "constipation" in public without embarrassment (ps. there's no normal pooping in pregnancy) - silently cussed out several stupid men who took the liberty of calling me "chubby" - mastered the art of secretly napping at work - concealed a million eye rolls after being told, "this is nothing compared to what's coming soon" - read things that scare the absolute beegeezus out of me - made keegles a part of my daily life - and, well...
I could go on and on!
But it won't be the misery of peeing my pants or overwhelming nausea that I remember when I see his perfect little face for the first time. In fact, I have a feeling that all of that suffering will fade away quickly leaving me only with the greatest blessing I have yet to receive.
One month to the day, and I can hardly wait!
It's amazing to me how much you can love someone that you've never met. Especially when that someone causes you to pee in your pants atleast once a day. I imagine his little face, so perfect and round, and how precious it will be to see his soft, tiny hand wrapped around John's finger. I wonder if I will melt into a ball of mush at the first sound of his baby cries or what it will feel like the day we bring him home. Will he have John's great hair, my eyes, a good sense of humor? Will he be a t-ball all-star or spelling bee champ? Will he love me as much as I already love him? And will the first moment I hold him in my arms be as overwhelmingly wonderful as I have envisioned?
These are the sweet thoughts I wrap myself in on the days when the "joys" of pregnancy are staring me down into the toilet. I have definitely earned a new-found respect for mother's across the globe, because, let me tell ya', it sure hasn't been easy, Soulshine. In fact, some of those days have been down-right miserable!
There was the morning that I yacked in the shower! I couldn't stop puking so, naked & wet, I proceeded towards the toilet where... I puked so hard, I pee'd ALL OVER THE FLOOR. And if that wasn't bad enough, in the midst of being exhausted from puking and still green with nausea, I had to clean out a shower that was filled with last night's dinner and a floor that was covered in a bladder full of pee. I didn't eat lima beans again for 6 months! (I know, I know. You're thinking you could have done without that, right? Well, so could I!)
Then came month 6 when I had my flu shot & glucose screening (to test for diabetes). Apparently the combination was too much for my already tired body and somewhere between the hours of 2 and 3, I passed out cold on my desk at work, waking up 2 hours later to a pile of drool and one very confused customer.
Oh! Then there was that unforgettable night at John's softball game, in the fall. Sporting my newly protruding belly, I made way to the bathroom stall to pee. I was still learning how to maneuver properly and apparently, hadn't worked out all the kinks in my squat & hover (ladies - we all know about the public bathroom "squat & hover") and I pee'd all down the back of my brand new maternity blue jeans. Imagine the embarrassment of walking back out to a bleacher full of people with a huge dark stain down the back of your pants. Not pleasant! I imagined the baby, all snuggled in my belly, laughing his adorable buns off at his idiot mommy who just pee'd herself.
I've had heartburn & headaches that I thought would kill me - learned to say the words "diarrhea" & "constipation" in public without embarrassment (ps. there's no normal pooping in pregnancy) - silently cussed out several stupid men who took the liberty of calling me "chubby" - mastered the art of secretly napping at work - concealed a million eye rolls after being told, "this is nothing compared to what's coming soon" - read things that scare the absolute beegeezus out of me - made keegles a part of my daily life - and, well...
I could go on and on!
But it won't be the misery of peeing my pants or overwhelming nausea that I remember when I see his perfect little face for the first time. In fact, I have a feeling that all of that suffering will fade away quickly leaving me only with the greatest blessing I have yet to receive.
One month to the day, and I can hardly wait!
9.24.2008
little boy blue
Model airplanes & t-ball games...
IT'S A BOY!
(due date standing strong at January 22nd)
8.08.2008
16 weeks and counting
I got to hear baby's heartbeat for the first time this week - Wednesday, August 6th to be exact. Talk about a soulshine moment! Now this bump is not the only evidence that a special little something is on its way.
7.14.2008
a time for fertilizer
I never paid much attention to butterbeans. I knew that my "nannie" used to make them for after-church lunch on Sundays - cooked in a pound of butter and so tender they melted in your mouth. They're tiny. Green. Grow in pods. That's about all of the information I had gathered. Never had a need for anything further.
Recently, butterbeans became more significant in my life. I discovered that they are actually seeds, eaten as vegetables. Generally 1 to 3 cm in length and oval shaped. They are an excellent nutritional choice and go nicely with a dash of salt and pat of butter.
Much like butterbeans are something else twice as nice. Tiny. Green (but not in the literal form - let's hope). An excellent nutritional choice. Currently measuring in at about 2 1/2 cm. Due to sprout in mid January. And currently resides in the safest nook of my belly...
A precious little baby - our "Butterbean". Something I'm sure that will go even nicer with a dash of salt and pat of butter.
Recently, butterbeans became more significant in my life. I discovered that they are actually seeds, eaten as vegetables. Generally 1 to 3 cm in length and oval shaped. They are an excellent nutritional choice and go nicely with a dash of salt and pat of butter.
Much like butterbeans are something else twice as nice. Tiny. Green (but not in the literal form - let's hope). An excellent nutritional choice. Currently measuring in at about 2 1/2 cm. Due to sprout in mid January. And currently resides in the safest nook of my belly...
A precious little baby - our "Butterbean". Something I'm sure that will go even nicer with a dash of salt and pat of butter.
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